Silence Of The Whales


Some stereotypes are based in fact or at the very least, supported by experience.  Black folks are gonna be about 15 minutes late. Mexicans know their way around a lawn.  Asians keep a nail shop handy.  And white folks don’t have a healthy fear of Mother Nature.

This stereotype about white folks is precisely why there is a 22-foot, 12,000 lb killer whale in a swimming pool in the middle of a theme park being massaged (WTF?) while thousands of people a day look on. (click here)  Every year, hard earned tax dollars are spent rescuing white folks from bears and antelopes, from avalanches and tornados, from tinfoil balloons and bungee cords…the list goes on and on. Talk about the deficit!  Just the other day, a white friend invited me to go skydiving.  (Clearly, he don’t know me like that) I just don’t get it.  Where the hell are these peoples mamas?  I wish I would tell my little Korean mama that I’ma fly up in a plane, tie a back pack to my dumb ass and jump out (all the while praying that there was no mixup and I’m not tumbling toward the earth at an accelerating 9.8 m/s2 multiplied by my fat ass with Little Johnny’s school books strapped to my back.)  Ever get your ass nunchaku’d with some porcelain chopsticks by a lady who’s not even tall enough to ride the Tilt-a-Whirl?  Try that. I guarantee you it’ll cure you of thrill seeking.

Anyway, now this trainer has been killed by the killer whale who’s named after killing because…well, it KILLS.   Yet SeaWorld has no intention of discontinuing future shows.  Only now, they have a whale who ain’t gonna satisfied with no damn fish or pelican chops and a pat on the nose as a reward.  This whale?  He wants human femur when he does a good job.  Maybe a small piece of pancreas.  Or perhaps a little liver…with fava beans and chianti.


10 thoughts on “Silence Of The Whales

  1. Actually, I heard long john silver’s and McDonalds are going to team up and fly the whale back to alaska.

    Yup, release him in the same vicinity that both corporations have fish factories working the area.

  2. if you can do nothing else, learn from Sigfried and Roy theses animals were not meant to be takin out of their own habitats not to mention they were mindin their own business then meant to do tricks for the entertainment of mankind. I mean this joker damn near got his head bit off by a tiger smdh. I would be so angry if I was this girls mother no the show just cant go on and yes one monkey do stop a show. especially if he just went ape shits and tried to pick the eyes out of his trainer lol in poor taste of course.

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