Guns Don’t Kill People and Neither Do Swiss Men In Tight Pants

It’s the eve of McDonald v. City of Chicago and the bodies of two gunshot victims were identified in Camden and I’m sick as a dog — the last one is not really a gunshot reference unless, of course, you mean in an Old Yeller kinda way.  (which, given the way I feel, should not be completely ruled out as an option)

I’m firmly against gun control laws unless someone can prove that they are able to curb gun violence more efficiently than other controls.  In the U.S., a certain liberal group (who will remain nameless because I love My Boo) believes that gun control is critical to stemming the tide of violent crimes.  What up with dat? I mean, really is Ted from Accounting who legally purchased and registered his handgun going to shoot up a crackhouse in a turf war with a rival drug dealers on his way home from the office?  Probably not.  Really, is someone who pre-meditated and planned a rampage-style shooting spree going to balk at purchasing a gun from the black market? Probably not.

The problem is not that bad guys shoot guns.  The problem is that the good guys don’t. 

Listen, in Switzerland, every man who ain’t crippled or crazy gets a semi-automatic weapon for universal conscription.  In other words, just in case some sh*t goes down, all the Swiss boys are ready to bang, like some European-ass, fondue eatin’ Crips.  They keep their gov’t issued semi-automatic weapons at home.  They are also allowed by law to supplement their inventory.  They all get 50 rounds of ammo free.  The guns rarely get used except for recreational shooting. Switzerland is one of the safest countries in the world.  Little Swiss kids aren’t at home accidently shooting themselves or each other.  But…little Swiss criminals certainly do think twice before startin’ some mess.  They may be less inclined to break into someone’s home if they know they’re liable to get their schnitzel shot off.  This might also explain why Swiss men wear their pants so tight.  I’m not really sure how, I just really want to know why.

If it works there, why doesn’t it work here?  There could be a million reasons. But out of control gun acquisition ain’t one of ’em.  So, I hope tomorrow the Supreme Court makes the right decision.  You cannot reduce gun violence by disarming the law abiding citizens. It’s the equivalent of scratching your ass when your ear itches.  Sure, you’ve done something but your ass’ll tell ya – you missed the mark.  If you want to decrease gun violence, you must start with education and awareness.  Try this:  teach the law abiding citizens case law around self defense and how to sharp-shoot moving targets.  And then make everyone aware of it.  Clearly, this approach won’t result in an increase in gun control. But it will result in a decrease of people who are willing to break the laws we already have.


5 thoughts on “Guns Don’t Kill People and Neither Do Swiss Men In Tight Pants

  1. The gun control thing is such a weird topic. Honestly, no matter how the SC rules on gun control laws, as long as there is a military, guns (purchased legally or illegally) will always end up on the street.

    I am almost inclined to agree with Chris Rock that maybe the bullets become the commodity. Then the decision for the criminal becomes “fly shoes” or “fly bullets”.

    Regardless of either path that is taken, I do distinctly remember 4 black girls standing outside a club on the isle of Bermuda, watching a fight, knowing that no one was going to get shot because not even the po-po carried guns (tweet tweet)….hmmm there was something quite peaceful about watching a good ole fashion beat down without bullets…

    • Uh, HELLO!!! 3 1/2 black girls. KIMCHI and collard greens! LOL, just playing girl. I”m all worked up from taking the census. After 15 pages of interrogation, I just marked the box that said, “Good n’ black”

  2. People kill people with guns.

    I’ve realized over the years that guns are the problem, America is the problem. WE ARE CRAZY! Their is something wrong with Americans and how we think. Honestly and truly.

    They have guns in other countries…Lots of people in canada have guns but they don’t have the level of violence that we have. What gives?

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