Has it come to this? Singles, I know the pickins are slim but damn! The statistics are frightening and the reality can be discouraging but we have to make sure for our own sanity and perhaps our own safety that we don’t mistake being somebody’s somebody for being anybody’s somebody. Not everyone deserves the opportunity to impact our lives and the lives of the little ones who depend on us.
This is a real tragedy. (click here) Devastating! Let’s not waste the lesson in it. I’ll admit you never know what folks are experiencing until you walk a mile in their shoes but I’d like to think that, as a therapist, I wouldn’t marry any student – especially if the class I taught was anger management. The suspect just got out of jail, then had to attend anger management class. And if I was going to marry someone who has to take a special class to manage his anger, I’d like to think I wouldn’t pick a recent graduate. Perhaps I’d pick someone with an advanced degree in anger management. Maybe someone who passed the practicum with flying colors or published a paper on it. We certainly wouldn’t be moving his tassel from one side to the other on the way to the altar. The last thing I need is to finally find my soul mate only to be stabbed 57 times with a butter knife because I didn’t pass him the gravy the first time he asked.
Not to trivialize this…because the real tragedy is the child who lost his mother and the tremendous hurdle he’ll spend the rest of his life trying to clear. Perhaps he’ll continue the cycle of abuse, certainly he’ll have anger of his own to conquer. With a bit of blessing, the remaining adults in his life will squeeze out of this horrific experience the only possible teaching moment – violence is not a means of communication, for anger or any other emotion.